As I’ve been talking with people recently about the new Transformational Practice Community I’m launching at Tribe in Transition, I’ve realised that the concept of transformational practice is not yet part of our shared currency, and there’s a lot of uncertainty about what the transformational process is.
I do this work because I want to spark conversations that reveal what we have in common as human beings living through these tumultuous times. The conversations and the understandings that arise are not ends in themselves, although they can be exciting and liberating. They also lead to new choices and experimental actions – and this is where change happens – through small shifts in consciousness, daily choices and actions that uplift our well-being and all our relationships. When we come together in intentional groups these shifts and changes are amplified and accelerated, making it easier to move forward and make the changes we long for. And then this expanded consciousness ripples out into the collective consciousness…and the possibility for a new culture arises.
My Mantra is One Step at a Time.
When life is confusing or difficult what is your next step?
I’m going to map some possible steps for you.
Step One: Grow Your understanding 
When I talk of the process of transformation, I’m talking about psycho-spiritual transformation – or how consciousness evolves within each of us.
And cultural transformation – or how this evolving consciousness motivates us to co-create new forms and ways of being together that are more in harmony with life.
By observing my experience over a lifetime I’ve noticed that transformation happens through a rhythm of expansion, followed by contraction, followed by more expansion.
Like the breath, this is a natural and involuntary process. In other words, we don’t make transformation happen – it happens through us.
And we can learn to co-operate with it.
When consciousness expands, we typically experience a physical, mental and emotional relaxation, upliftment, liveliness and spaciousness. We feel joy, excitement, clarity, a sense of possibility and direction. We feel part of everything and know that all life is interconnected. Everything makes sense and we know what we’re here for. We respond to our experience from a place of love. Often this is called awakening.
When consciousness contracts we typically experience a tensing of the body and a tightening of the mind and emotions. We typically feel stressed, overwhelmed, confused, angry and frustrated. We react to our experience from a place of fear or alienation. This may be called crisis.
In the expanded state we feel connected to everything. In the contracted state we feel separate and isolated.
In the expanded state we feel love and trust. When we’re contracted, we feel distrust and alienation.
Expansion gives rise to response-ability. Contraction gives rise to reactivity.
Neither state is permanent, but we tend to cling to expanded states and identify with them, whereas we want to push the contracted states away.
That’s like saying, “I like the in-breath but I’m not going to breathe out”.
When we’re expanded, we feel confident and happy with who we are. When we’re contracted, we tend to criticise ourselves and feel a failure. Or we blame others.
The mind craves the security of a stable and pleasing identity and avoids uncertainty and not-knowing.
But the natural cycles of the life force move through light, shadow and darkness and the transformational impulse is always evolving. We can’t depend upon anything outside of us to give us that sense of security we are craving. It can only be found within.
Wholeness – the experience of peace, joy, love and strength we long for, is our natural state. It is always within us. But we become disconnected from it. Just as clouds cover the sun, our old unconscious habits of mind cause us to forget who we really are. It is possible to develop a more stable connection with inner wholeness – a wholeness which embraces darkness and shadow as well as the light.
Step Two: Remember you are part of a much bigger design
What is the transformational impulse and where does it come from?
You could say where does the breath come from?
Or why do the tides go in and out?
Breath is the life force. It keeps us alive. It moves through us and circulates around the world passing through many beings.
This is how life is programmed. Our bodies are designed to breathe. We don’t even have to think about it, it just happens.
Similarly, the tides move in and out in response to the moon’s gravity and the rotation of the Earth. In other words, life on Earth is part of the grand design within the universal dance of planets and space. We humans are of the Earth and of the Universe and we are pulsed by an intelligent life force which has an evolutionary agenda.
An intelligent life force moves through everything and when we learn to receive it, respond to it, and co-operate with it we become consciousness-in-action. We – you and I – are the vehicles through which consciousness can expand into new forms.
And to make space for the new we need to let go of the old.
It’s a simple, natural process. But we forget we are part of the natural and universal design and movement of life. Our human tendency to become self-absorbed, self-centred, isolated and separated, blinds us to the stunning mystery we are part of.
Step Three: Embrace the suffering heart
If psycho-spiritual transformation – or the transformation of consciousness – is a natural, universal movement of energy and intelligence, why is it so challenging?
When you’re in the intensity of a transformational process, it can feel like being taken apart and then coming back together again in a new, more spacious and integrated way.
From a human point of view this unsettling. You may feel out of control, and the victim of some sort of crisis. You may feel lost, broken and defeated.
When the process begins with expansion or awakening, light floods in and brings you a vision or revelation of how life can be at its most beautiful. This light also illuminates everything within you that is limited and not yet in alignment with wholeness and authenticity. As the light fades and you are left with your imperfect and unfinished self you may feel bereft and heartbroken – as if yu are waking up from a good and powerful dream only to find that all your problems are still here.
Now it is necessary to embrace your confused and suffering heart. Feel everything that is arising and allow the energy of transformation to flow through as it clears out what is old and no longer life-giving.
This letting go can feel like loss, something is dying, and you need to grieve.
Or you feel disillusioned, even with those people and activities you have loved.
Old trauma, held in the body, may be reactivated and this can throw your nervous system into stress and your relationships into reactivity.
And when you’re in a contracted space, you feel separated and alone. You take it all personally. You think there’s something wrong with you. Sometimes the pain is so intense you think you can’t survive it. That you’re not strong enough. That you will die.
And a part of you is dying.
The transformational impulse is breaking open your old identity. Your old story of self is no longer big enough to hold you as you grow. And you need to grow.
So you must suffer the letting go and endure a time of healing, reparation and integration.
This can’t be rushed and it is necessary to develop patience and trust in the process.
Step Four: Let Go of What is Limiting You
Your transformational process may start with an awakening – a beautiful feeling of love, connection and trust, a revelation or vision of a meaningful world and universe, and your place within it.
Or, it may start with an existential crisis – feelings of disillusionment, alienation and failure.
After the light, comes darkness. After the darkness, comes light.
This is an opportunity to let go of whatever is limiting you –
Old, deeply conditioned beliefs in unworthiness, inadequacy and lack.
Patterns of trauma you have carried in your body for a lifetime, which still disrupt your relationships and your health.
Patterns which you learned from your parents and which they learned from theirs.
Beliefs you may not even know are in you, and repeating patterns of behaviour which are unconscious, prevent you from experiencing the full possibilities of love and creativity and stop you from fulfilling your soul purpose.
Patterns which you thought you’d dealt with – and yet here they are again, clamouring to be seen and heard, longing to be witnessed and welcomed into the loving embrace of the Self.
Letting go can be hard. Seeing through our illusions can be painful and it’s human nature to want to resist or avoid pain.
Find a Practice and Follow a Path 
There is a path that I follow and I’m inviting you to join me.
-
Know the experience of wholeness and make it your guiding star – not in a way that you try to cling to it – but as a remembrance and a vision of who you truly are and what is possible.
-
Develop your understanding of the transformational process so that, even though you may feel torn apart or broken, you have a container in which to hold your experience.
-
As a daily practice, cultivate awareness – notice when you’re feeling less than whole.
-
Practice being fully present with all your experience as it arises while at the same time witnessing it.
-
Practice discernment – at this moment do I need to rest and re-source myself? Do I need to shift my consciousness? Do I need to let go of a limiting belief? Do I need to enter a deeper healing process?
-
Make simple, daily, moment – to-moment choices – right now I’m going to leave my computer and go outside into the garden to breathe and admire the flowers. Or, I notice I’m seeing the glass as empty and I can make the shift to seeing it as overflowing. Or, this is a recurring experience and I’m willing to give it time and space, to explore it and see where it leads me.
-
Follow your choice with experimental actions – actions taken from beginner’s mind, where you don’t get too attached to particular outcomes or attach your self-worth to particular results. But instead, you enter the flow of unfolding experience with curiosity, trust and willingness.
-
Remember you are not alone but part of a collective, global movement and that you make a difference. Reaching out for support when you feel vulnerable is not a weakness but a sign of strength.
