January 28th 2011
Your Conscious Life 4: The Joy Experiment
I’ve been feeling challenged this last month and I know many others have too. I’ve been missing my joy. You know how sometimes you don’t really appreciate something (or someone) until it’s/they’re gone. Joy is one of those magic ingredients that can light up even the dullest day and make life worthwhile. It comes unbidden, for a moment, or a half hour, or longer. It’s like an inner light: warm, alive, dancing, glowing. And when joy disappears life feels pretty flat and empty. It’s all still going on but there’s a strange sense of separation or disconnection. Without joy I feel like a stranger to myself. I know this too will pass, it’s just another part of the process, but hey, I want my joy back!
So the other day I was talking to a buddy on the other side of the world, via Skype – isn’t that something to have a friend suddenly appear right here in your room, speaking through this little black box, and all for free; it delights me every time! And she’d been feeling flat too, so I said, “Why don’t we do an experiment for a week? Why don’t we intentionally do one thing each day to bring us joy?” And she said, “Ok, that sounds good.” And then I hopped onto another Skype call with my best friend, Woods in Virginia, USA, and I said, “Hey Woods, do you want to do an experiment for a week and choose to do one thing each day to bring you joy?” And he said, “Ok, Yes, Great!”
And so the Joy Experiment was born! And I invite you to join us. The thing I love about experiments is there’s no right or wrong, no success or failure, it’s all about noticing what happens, becoming more aware.
The first day I didn’t do so well with joy but I did have a great insight. We’re having the most beautiful summer here in New Zealand and what I really wanted to do was go string a hammock between some trees and sway beneath the dancing leaves and dappled sunshine, dreaming and watching the clouds float by. But I couldn’t find the right spot outside so I lay down on the bed and read a novel. It was pretty cool to have the luxury of getting lost in a novel in the middle of the day but on this occasion it didn’t bring me joy, in fact it increased my flat feeling. I remembered that when I was a kid I would go find a quiet spot and read for hours to comfort myself and keep myself feeling safe in my unpredictable family. And I realized that the joy I’m after doesn’t come from staying safe in the comfort zone, it comes when I stretch myself just a little beyond habitual comforts. And that gave me the joy of discovery!
So, Day 2, another beautiful summer’s day dawned and this whole day was an explosion of one joy after another. In the afternoon I decided to go to the beach. I’ve been a water baby all my life, love being in water: the sea, the river, a soak in the hot tub, it’s something to do with feeling immersed in nature and the calming energy of water. But this year I’ve barely been in the water at all, I’ve become more focused on the obstacles – don’t want to get changed, wet, cold, sandy. So here’s another revelation: focus on the obstacles and we miss the joy. So, I chose to go swimming and it was of course wonderful, as it always is, so healing being in the salty sea with the sunlight dancing on the turquoise water and the mountains on the other side of the bay, under the big blue sky. How blessed I am! Joy is a state where we start to wonder how we ever could have complained or seen life as less than perfect. Just that simple act of intention, choice, moving slightly out of my comfort zone, changed everything. It was as if joy had been a closed door and I couldn’t even see the doorway, now suddenly the door was wide open and joy was streaming in and through me. What a wonderful feeling! Fully alive again, part of it all, zingy, bubbly, excited, life is good, expect the best. The good fairy just flew in with a feather duster, making everything shiny and new, showering gifts of grace.
Funny, isn’t it? Nothing had actually changed in the world but I was seeing it differently. Something had shifted and opened in me. Joy is our natural state; it’s there all the time, like the sun. Only sometimes we can’t see it or feel its warmth. Experiencing more joy requires both intention and surrender. Yes, it comes unbidden, as a gift of grace. And yes, we can choose it and cultivate it, share it and spread it.
Join us for the Joy Experiment on facebook: www.facebook.com/rose.diamond7
Rose Diamond.
Thank you Rose. May I share a contribution to your joyous creation?
I enjoy riding a bicycle! The joy of riding comes as I see, hear and smell things as I move along easily through the environment. It is slow enough I can notice little things and fast enough that I get where I want to go in very little time. It is a really alive feeling with the breeze of riding and a smile inside. It is a feeling of independence and a great stress relief at the end of the day.
I ride most days about 5 kilometres in the morning and another five in the afternoon. I only ride when the weather is okay. Mostly it is fairly flat but in the morning there is one big down hill. It is a bit like skiing. It is exhilarating rushing down and around the corners. The bike is well built and safe and the brakes work well.
In the evening there is a big hill to come up. Hills and distances are no problem for me as I have an electric assist front wheel drive in the bike.
This electric assist on my bicycle is so neat. It makes the bike go easily along the flats and even easily up the hills. Thank you, thank you, thank you to all the people involved in developing these Electric bikes.
The bike I have is a Wisper brand http://www.wisperbikes.com/ and it is a fold up. It is imported in New Zealand by Anthony Clyde of NZ Electric Bikes http://www.electricbikes.co.nz.
I met Anthony at a show and he gave me a ride of a bike. It felt good but I was not sure about buying one. Then a friend got one and I had a go on his. Hills were no problem, riding into the wind was not problem. I was sold. I bought one and now I leave the car at home most days and have the fun of riding instead.
Now that I have taken the big step and bought an electric bike, riding is not hard work because the electric motor takes a big share of the pedalling. I just do as much as I want. There are four settings for the electric assist. Low, medium, high or off. It is easy to switch as you are riding along so I get just as much exercise as I want each trip. There are a few gears and that makes things easy too. All the fun and freedom of riding. Yes. Bonus is I am steadily getting fitter as well!
Hi David,
Thank you for joining me on the blog and in the Joy Experiment. I used to be a cyclist myself, love that feeling of being able to get around easily, under my own steam, rushing down hills, being exercised. I see lots of people cycling around Nelson these sunny summers days and think about getting another bike. The electric bike sounds perfect, none of that slogging up hills or battling against the wind!
joyfully
Rose